CONTINUED… A cardboard comedy for 7 year olds
HANNAH: If you could all fill out these forms, just to make sure that should anything happen, that loved ones are informed and there’s nobody who will sue. [She laughs manically.]
[Papers are passed round, everyone groans.]
ESKY: Is this really necessary? It’s just admin.
HANNAH: It’s administration!
ESKY: Sorry. Is this really necessary? It’s just administration!
CLAIRE: Enough. Stealth. Remembereth!
ALL:Stealth.
CLAIRE: Anyway.The Plan.
ALL:The Plan.
CLAIRE: I believe the Ben and Jerry Division have something on this.
ALL:The Plan.
[A giant board is brought out by TODD and PAUL, documenting the Plan.]
PAUL: SO, the Plan.
ALL: The Plan.
CLAIRE: Stop it!
TODD: Yes. We intend to infiltrate through the back courtyard, into the green walled maze and through to the main chamber.
PAUL: The back courtyard is guarded by three puppy dogs and Pekinese poodle. All are vicious.
TODD: Luckily though, we have obtained a Nibblet from a local bazaar to distract the puppy dogs and the poodle, giving us enough time to sneak past in the green walled maze.
CLAIRE: Division – you have the next part of the puzzle.
[ESKY brings out a bigger board.]
ESKY: Yes. The green walled maze was a hard nut to navigate. However, speaking to a local bookkeeper, he showed me ‘the Golden Compass.’ And I said, “Isn’t this called ‘Northern Lights’?” And he said, “no, it’s called ‘the Golden Compass’”. SO, we have the golden compass to guide us through the green walled maze.
CLAIRE: Excellent. Native, Local and Supermarket Divisions – you hold the key…
TO BE CONTINUED
PHILIPPA MANNION 