PHILIPPA MANNION

[A sofa in a room.]

-When?
-10 mins
-It’s been an hour
-It’s been twenty-five minutes.
-FUCK!
-I just want to eat
-I want it so bad
-I know, I know, I know
-I know you know. You know
-I know

-Do you want a coke?
-I want pizza
-Yes, but do you want a drink?
-Can I have a coke?
-That’s what I just said
-Shall we warm up the plates in the oven?
-So unnecessary.
-It’s going bypass your plate, straight to your face
-Correct answer

-WHERE ARE THEY?
-Calm – let’s try some breathing
-WHAT?
-We are going to watch Masterchef and wait calmly and patiently for them to arrive
-Really?
-Yes
-Oh
-If we don’t talk about it, we won’t think about it.
-Ha!

[Pause.]

-I can’t take it ANYMORE

[They run around the room, do a few star jumps and jog on the spot.]

-What are you doing?
-I’m not thinking about it
-Right

[The intensity of exercise escalates from now til the end of the scene.]

-Well, it’s definitely distracting
-You need to try this – I feel fantastic
-Really?
-Oh, like you wouldn’t believe
-Have you seen the dessert that he’s made
-Yeah!
-Yeah, it’s collapsing all over the place
-Sure
-14 tier wedding cakes are always a bad idea
-Big cake, bad marriage
-She speaks the truth.
-Touch those toes
-I’m working it
-Working off those calories before
-Don’t talk about it
-Do some press ups! Do some press ups!

[The doorbell goes.]

-I’LL GET IT!
-I’ll get it!

[They both run off.]